[Joke] It Takes a Village

Friend,

Here's Timothy May, the self-appointed village headman.
He's surrounded by a bunch of arse-kissing accolytes:
-"Gosh, I thought that Java was garbage, but now that Tim mentions it,
it's the best thing in the world"
-"Tim's right, Java is terrific."

Village Jester: "Tim's dead wrong.  Java isn't good--it's great!" 

Then there's Perry Metzger, the local squire, who's embittered over the
fact that, while he's got some worthwhile things to say, he's always
overpowered by the "charisma" and new clothes of May.

Jim Bell, village idiot.  He's always good sport for the village bully,
Black Unicorn.  His pretentions aside ("the black unicorn has been in
my family crest for a thousand years"), he is in actuality a short,
portly Philadelphia accountant by the name of Irving Lipshitz-Groins.

Cordially,

Your village historian

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
                          SANDY SANDFORT
 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

C'punks,

On Tue, 30 Apr 1996, ECafe Anonymous Remailer wrote:

> Here's Timothy May, the self-appointed village headman...[and
> a lot more sophomoric garbage.]
> ...
> Your village historian

But not a very good one, unfortunately.  Humor only works if it
has at least a nodding acquaintence with the truth.  This silly
screed had none. 

Once again we are treated to an attack on his betters by an 
anonymous nobody in the form of a feigned (and strained) mask of 
"witty" commentary.  What disappointments in life could have
produced such an impotent, resentful loser?


 S a n d y     	Village Apologist

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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In article <199604300949.KAA05650@pangaea.hypereality.co.uk>,
cpunk@remail.ecafe.org (ECafe Anonymous Remailer) wrote:

> Jim Bell, village idiot.  He's always good sport for the village bully,
> Black Unicorn.  His pretentions aside ("the black unicorn has been in
> my family crest for a thousand years"), he is in actuality a short,
> portly Philadelphia accountant by the name of Irving Lipshitz-Groins.

jim bell is really a short, portly Philadelphia accountant named Irving 
Lipshitz-Groins?

- -- 
Alan Bostick               | They say in online country there is no middle way
mailto:abostick@netcom.com | You'll either be a Usenet man or a thug for the CDA
news:alt.grelb             |    Simon Spero (after Tom Glazer)
http://www.alumni.caltech.edu/~abostick

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On Tue, 30 Apr 1996, Alan Bostick wrote:

> -----BEGIN PGP SIGNED MESSAGE-----
> 
> In article <199604300949.KAA05650@pangaea.hypereality.co.uk>,
> cpunk@remail.ecafe.org (ECafe Anonymous Remailer) wrote:
> 
> > Jim Bell, village idiot.  He's always good sport for the village bully,
> > Black Unicorn.  His pretentions aside ("the black unicorn has been in
> > my family crest for a thousand years"), he is in actuality a short,
> > portly Philadelphia accountant by the name of Irving Lipshitz-Groins.
> 
> jim bell is really a short, portly Philadelphia accountant named Irving 
> Lipshitz-Groins?

Nono, that's ME!  ME!  How in bloody hell am I supposed to keep this cover
going if people attribute perfectly good disinformation to Mr. Bell?
(Sigh).

---
My preferred and soon to be permanent e-mail address:unicorn@schloss.li
"In fact, had Bancroft not existed,       potestas scientiae in usu est
Franklin might have had to invent him."    in nihilum nil posse reverti
00B9289C28DC0E55  E16D5378B81E1C96 - Finger for Current Key Information
Opp. Counsel: For all your expert testimony needs: jimbell@pacifier.com

On Tue, 30 Apr 1996, ECafe Anonymous Remailer wrote:

> Friend,

[...]

> Jim Bell, village idiot.  He's always good sport for the village bully,
> Black Unicorn.  His pretentions aside ("the black unicorn has been in
> my family crest for a thousand years"), he is in actuality a short,
> portly Philadelphia accountant by the name of Irving Lipshitz-Groins.

Bullies have to be somewhat superior to intimidate and even Philadelphia
accountants have family crests on occasion.

---
My preferred and soon to be permanent e-mail address:unicorn@schloss.li
"In fact, had Bancroft not existed,       potestas scientiae in usu est
Franklin might have had to invent him."    in nihilum nil posse reverti
00B9289C28DC0E55  E16D5378B81E1C96 - Finger for Current Key Information
Opp. Counsel: For all your expert testimony needs: jimbell@pacifier.com